Monday, 23 October 2017

Three Episodes of Unreason

On Wednesday, we had celebrated communion at Widelake House, the local care home. Arthur usually plays the piano on these occasions and I give him a lift home. While doing this he was in the back seat of the car – I’d already dropped someone else off who usually occupies the front passenger seat. And chatting in his customary light tone which was not all that easy to hear. I suddenly realised I was automatically tapping the volume control of my car radio to turn him up.
. . . . . . . . . . . . 

Later, Trevor called.

Trevor: Someone’s doing bread.
Me: Er, what do you mean?
Trevor: Someone’s doing bread.
Me: Yes, I heard you, but I don’t understand. Explain it to me.
Trevor: Someone is eating bread so that I will go back into Satan.
Me: No, I still don’t really get it. How can eating bread make you ‘go back into Satan’, whatever that means?
Trevor: Satan can bless and curse his people and the occult meet and eat holy bread like we do in church so that things will happen, and they’re doing it to make me go to Hell.
Me: How do you know this is happening?
Trevor (as though I’m an idiot): I can smell bread!!
. . . . . . . . . . 

Later still, it was the after-school club at the infants’ school. I was sat at the table with Lauren, who has a philosophical turn of mind for a five-year-old.

Lauren: You know everything because you’re a vicar.
Me: Oh, I don’t think I know everything.
Lauren: What don’t you know?
Me: Well, I don’t know what I don’t know. If I knew what I don’t know, I would know it and it wouldn’t be what I don’t know. 
Lauren: That doesn’t make any sense.

4 comments:

  1. I see a flaw in Lauren's logic. You might know everything, but being a vicar doesn't have anything to do with it.

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  2. Yes, I should have challenged the premises!

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  3. How's Lauren on the smell of bread, I wonder? Might help Trevor on the road back from unreason.

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  4. "I don't know what you are going to say next"

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