Happy New Year!

'Why,' I asked the children in the church porch a couple of days ago, 'would someone not only trash the children's corner in church with half-eaten packets of chocolate biscuits, kebab boxes and fag papers, and scatter the toys around the church, but actually tear apart two rag dollies?' 'You ask us like it was us, and it wasn't!' protested Liam. 'I'm not saying it was you, I'm just a bit bewildered,' I said, because I was.